Roofer Salomon Susi chewed out his client, a debt collection lawyer named Rami Shmuely, for not paying his bill, telling him in a phone call, "Pay your f---ing bill," and "Don't be a f---ing schlub." Shmuely cried foul and took Susi to court, claiming use of the F-word, plus "schlub," which means boorish or slovenly in Yiddish, violated a state law barring vulgar or obscene language. Nonsense, ruled Miami-Dade County Judge Gloria Gonzalez-Meyer. "I think that's absurd," she said of the lawsuit filed by Shmuely. "I think that's why people hate lawyers." She granted summary judgment in favor of Susi and his Hialeah-based company Salomon Roofing and Construction Corp. Shmuely appealed, but the original decision was upheld. Shmuely said Susi had botched a roofing job on his North Miami home when he failed to tarp the roof at the end of a day. The house sustained water damage. Shmuel paid the $35,000 roofing tab, but sued Susi separately over the work and got a $22,500 insurance settlement plus a promise the roof would be fixed. Susi, in turn, has sued Shmuely for malicious prosecution.

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